Sunday, August 22, 2010

COLOR COMMENTARY

One Saturday, Fred decided to take his sixteen year old daughter Jane car shopping. Her grades were good, and she had been holding down a part time job, so he felt she was worthy of her own set of wheels. Not yet in the first mile of their shopping excursion, Jane let out an ear piercing shriek proclaiming that she had found her ride of choice. "That one, that one right there!" she screamed.
Slamming on the brakes, Fred sailed into the otherwise vacant lot where the only vehicle present was a 1987 Ford F-350 diesel crew cab truck, complete with dual wheels and contractor's "shop body". Unsure, Fred asked his daughter if he had missed the car she was bellowing about. He had barely stopped his pick-up when she jumped out, ran across the lot and hugged the old Ford work truck as if it were her long lost soul mate.
Naturally assuming that this was his little girl's idea of a practical joke, he reminded her that their time was limited and asked her to get back in the pick-up. But Jane persisted, proclaiming that this hulking mass of metal, rust, and oil leaks was exactly the vehicle she both needed and wanted. Realizing both that she had never picked up a tool in her life, and that she was hoping to major in English literature (not masonry) after high school, Fred felt obligated to start asking some questions.
He asked Jane if she knew what kind of fuel mileage this truck was probably going to get. She proudly said that she didn't care. He then asked if she understood how difficult this truck was going to be to park. She acted as she didn't even hear him. When he asked if there was any practical purpose for her to own such a vehicle, she said "No, but who cares?"
Humoring her insanity, he suggested they call the number and see if they can arrange a test drive. She laughed and said "No way, why bother?". Upon further inspection, he noted to her that all six tires were bald, and the passenger door's glass was busted out. Again, his daughter ignored his observation.
Amazed at her ignorance, and short-sightedness, Fred impatiently asked her why on God's green Earth would she ever want such a colossally impractical vehicle to get from home to school in? Jane looked at him as if he had three heads, and after scolding him for being so incredibly ignorant and narrow minded she said "Are you kidding? Can't you see? It's BLUE!!!"

This story may seem unlikely and ridiculous in it's substance, but it's a perfect analogy to the liberal progressive's idea of advancement and hiring on the basis of "diversity".