ROADHOUSE TO THE RESCUE

First, I would like to apologize to the nation for waiting so long to fix our current economic "crises". You see, I've been busy working for a living as well as caring for our new baby. So now I will take a few minutes out of my schedule to submit my plan for economic recovery. Not so much because I think I am so scary smart, but because no one else seems to be doing it, much less our government.
I'm only going to do this once, so pay attention.

My plan consists of two parts.

Part one: Creating Incentive

1. Return the 750 billion dollars to the people and rescind the "bailout plan".
2. Lower all tax rates at all levels 3-5% for the foreseeable future.
3. Temporarily lower interest rates 1/4 point across the board.
4. Suspend capital gains taxes for a period of time not exceed one year, re-instate them at 30% less than the current rate.
5. Offer and aggressively promote government bonds to the public.
6. Permanently suspend all non-essential government spending, including all loans, grants and subsidies that are not expected to result in a reasonable return.
7. Stop illegal immigration and prosecute those who hire illegals.
8. Rescind all previous legislation that requires lenders to loan money to those who have questionable credit.

Part two: Instilling Confidence in the Market

1. File charges on anyone who is guilty of illegal lending practices.
2. In a very loud, public way, name those who are responsible for strong-arming the lending community into giving money to deadbeats. You know, the Clinton era Democrats.
3. Censure all those in Congress who supported such legislation.
4. Allow all delinquent loans to be foreclosed on and require those who applied for those loans to take an economics coarse before they can ever borrow again.
5. Draft legislation that requires all members of Congress to pass a basic economics coarse before they can participate in any legislation that involves money.
6. Fire Henry Paulson and replace him with Thomas Sowell.

Was that so difficult? Now, if there are no other pressing matters, I have to change a diaper.